August 3, 2011

Hey kiddies, have you played the entertaining and gut-busting game of Mad Lib-erals? Here’s how it works: You take a sentence and put your choices of  silly words into the blanks to make it so funny that you will want to puke. For example:

Joe ______ (plagiarizer, plugs, face lift) Biden is the Vice ______ (President, pole dancer, sous chef) of the United States. Joe Biden is well ______ (known, oiled, plastered) for erudite remarks about his ______ (political foes, anal gland, gynecomastia). The ______ (confused, esteemed, snot-nosed) Vice President recently accused the _____ (Tupperware, butt-putty, Tea) Party of being ______(goat milkers, sock sniffers, terrorists). Many ______ (psychologists, chicken sexers, bra-fitters) attribute Joe Biden’s _____ (inflammatory, scatological, snot-nosed) rhetoric to an organic disease known as ______ (a-hole, idiot, bloody traitor) syndrome.  We here at ReaganGirl are ______ (sympathetic, murderous, befuggered) of Biden’s decline in ______ ( brain cells, bladder protection, hair follicles). We understand that with ______ (liberalism, advanced years, nose hairs) comes a deficit in ______ (gonads, judgment, bladder protection). Be kind to old Joe Biden. After a lifetime of ______ (public service, boomtang, binge drinking) he deserves a ______ (break, swim with the sharks, trampling and evisceration by wild boars).

So, there you have it, Mad Lib-erals!  Are you ready to heave your guts out? Then…LET’S GO!

The American ______ (pustules, people, phone operators) have been subject for the last 2 weeks to the raging _____ (mud wrestling, debate, anvil hurling) in Congress. What were they ______ (picking their noses, fighting, hand-fishing) over? Why the _____ (bathroom, peep-show, debt) ceiling of course. What does this mean to ______ (average, bewigged, contagious) Americans like us? It means that _____ (President, Weimaraner, pootyhead) Obama can spend us into ______ (outer space, oblivion, Sumernumerary nipple syndrome) if the ______ (collywobbles, Congress, Mr. Bean Fan Club) increases the limit on his National ______ (credit, thank you, birthday) card.

Earlier this week members of the Tea _____ (cozy, Party, time) were labeled______ (Elves, Dwarfes, Hobbits) by Senior ______ (Senator, roach clip, skull grinder) John ______ (Trotsky, Lennon, orifice).  Members of the Tea Party had no reaction since they were busy ______ (shaving, waxing, plucking) their feet., the ______ (Soros, crackpot, tumor) backed group was busy ______ (intermarrying, pole dancing, protesting) at the offices of United States ______ (Congressmen, prune pastries, goldfish) in anticipation of the ______ (sebaceous cyst, budget, machete) vote. Videos have found their way onto the ______ (Internet, Birkenstock, liverwort) depicting  members ______ (hand-flapping, vote-stealing, oyster-floating) is large groups across the ______(pinhead, Joe Biden, parking lot).

In a happy story, Senator ______ (a-hole, Satan, Harry) Reid reflected sentimentally about his ______ (gonads, pomegranates, nose hairs) ripening in the Nevada ______ (sun, bone spur, bedpan).  He was ______ (hooched up, wistful, slobbering) about his beloved ______ (trees, jello molds, orchiectomy).  Senator ______ (nasty pants, rug hooker, Reid) said he missed his ______ (adult diaper, in-grown hair, home) in Nevada and would be ______ (sweaty, happy, infected) to leave the Washington D.C. ______ (hallucination, succubus, phlegm) for the peace and quiet of the ______ (toothpick, morgue, Las Vegas strip).

So there you have it! Another fun and exciting game of Mad Lib-erals. Be sure to ______ (join, gratify, enrich) me next week for another fabulous ______ (round, heat rash, supernumerary nipple) of Mad Lib-erals!

Gut Buster


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